When I first found Fandom (many years ago in the Age of Dial-Up), I decided to lurk to get an idea of what the whole thing was about. So I kept quiet for literal years until I talked to someone who ended up becoming my BFF to this day.

FWIW, I do get that many of the Discord servers can be overwhelming. Especially if it's for a big fandom and/or a juggernaut ship. There's nothing wrong with lurking if that's what you're comfortable with. <3